to forget or not to forget...

I forget things easily. I'm so forgetful that my Mom cannot depend on me to remind her on things which I would eventually forget what she reminded me to remind her about in the first place. Confused? Me too. I almost forgotten what I was writing halfway through the sentence. However, being adsent minded isn't always a bad thing. In life there are incidents which we would like to forget and some we would not like to forget.

I would like to forget the bad stuffs. I mean, who wouldn't? Rite? But our minds are not computers. We cannot simply 'choose' to forget. If there is a button which says "Delete" at the back of my head, then I would not be writing this blog entry and would probably be watching TV right now. That's why, for me, to forget (on purpose) is the most difficult thing to do. Simply because you just cannot do it. Jumping off the cliff is easier because it's executable. One cannot force one's self to 'forget'.

But we CAN forget things. That is my point. The things in life which we do not want to forget...we forget. Taking me as an example, I did not want to forget the year 2004. It was a great year! But as time passed by, my memory of 2004, every detail of it faded away... like falling pieces of jigsaw puzzles. A year ago (2005) I could recall the colour of shirts, the weather, the smell of food, etc. And now, I could hardly describe what happened. Though I have tried my very best, my every amount of determination that runs through my veins to retain all the great memories, it did not work...somehow.

What I fear the most now is to forget. When time has taken over my memories, all that I could recall would be vague and 'colourless'. Lifeless, in a sense that those memories do not seem 'real' anymore. I fear. I do not want to forget my good times with my friends, the pranks on teachers and the fun of being in high school. I seriously, resiliently evermore to the ends of the universe and the depths of the earth, do not want to forget them.

Forgetting something can be both a great thing and an embarrassing one. Great because it's great (duh) to never remember again those sad things that had happened in our lives. Forgetting, say someone else's name can be very very very very (100x) embarrassing. This happened to me yesterday. It was like this :
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I was in KLCC when a girl approached me. She looked at me and said, " Jonathan?". I didn't recognise her. I thought she was one of my juniors in high school. So, I said dryly, " Erm...who are you?". I lifted my eyebrow to show her that I'm lost in this conversation. She said, " I'm from the youth camp!"

"Which one?" I asked.

"The one that is printed on your shirt la!" Heck, I was wearing the camp T-Shirt.

"Huh...is it? Are you sure?" I was still very blur.

" Yeah, I was in the same group with you!!!" She walked away...

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I was embarrassed simply because I forgotten who she was. For heaven's sake, I yelled to myself, she was my groupmate! And the worst of all, I had the 'ability' to forget her!!!
Forgetting is a crime when it pisses people off...